‘Old Dogs’ has one of the Year’s Funniest Casts…So Why Am I Not Laughing?
-----The ‘Old Dogs’ trailer was composed of scenes so close to other comedies it was practically plagiarism. Take the Seth Green scene from the classic comedy ‘Without a Paddle’ for instance, the one where he cuddles with the bear…the only difference in ‘Old Dogs’ is that Green cuddles with a gorilla. Or how about the hard-hitting football game in ‘Wedding Crashers’…here, it’s Ultimate Frisbee. And yet, these scenes were funny once so, originality aside, couldn’t they be funny again? Thanks to frenetic editing and predictable gags, the answer is no.
-----‘Old Dogs’ follows successful sports marketers Charlie and Dan. The two have it made, their business growing steadily, until one day Dan finds out he has two kids. The product of a one-day marriage about seven years ago, the kids introduce a new challenge in both Dan and Charlie’s lives. Now they’ll have to find a balance between parenting and their business, before both fall apart. Sound like something you’ve seen before? Yeah, I thought so.
-----Robin Williams stars as Dan. The face is there but the laughs are not and even being the typically charismatic comedian he is, Williams struggles to squeeze out any humor from this predictable script. John Travolta plays his fun-loving business partner Charlie, in a role resembling his other comedic outings over the years, including his role in 2007’s ‘Wild Hogs,’ a film also directed by Walt Becker. Only here, Travolta doesn’t get many laughs at all, or even courteous chuckles as he plays the stereotypical ladies man getting old. Supplementing the two is third wheel Seth Green playing a boy-man as we’ve seen him many times before. Green is a personal favorite of mine, having done hilarious work in films like ‘Rat Race,’ ‘Without a Paddle,’ and even on the Adult Swim show ‘Robot Chicken’; so you’ll know it’s no joke when not even he can find his way to my funny bone. His moments are some of the film’s more inspired, but most have been displayed numerous times in the trailer, and even in other films, like the aforementioned ‘Without a Paddle’ rip-off sequence. Adding to the bizarre comedy team that somehow dodges laughs are the usually funny faces of Justin Long (’Dodgeball,’ ‘Accepted’), Dax Sheppard (also from ‘Without a Paddle’), Matt Dillon (‘You, Me, and Dupree’), Luis Guzman (‘Yes Man’), and a surprising cameo from the late Bernie Mac. I don’t think I’ve ever seen so many great comedians in such a predictable and unfortunately unfunny outing.
-----‘Old Dogs’ seems like a set of various skits that cold have been funny had they not been poorly executed, and in many cases, already done in other films. Lacking the control of his large comedic cast, Director Walt Becker is unable to balance the screen time among his actors, something superbly executed in the star-studded comedy classic ‘Rat Race’; or even this month’s enjoyable ‘The Men Who Stare at Goats.’ Many sequences are thrown together very rapidly, providing little time for faces like Justin Long to provide any material at all that wasn’t seen in the trailer. The result is a few laughs and a chuckle here or there, but nonetheless a consistently frustrating waste of comedic talent.
-----The editing in ‘Old Dogs’ is a nightmare. Scenes are cut so crudely that it seems like you’re watching a thirty second TV spot or even a fast-forwarded version of the film. This is case many times, and the harried editing leads way to a bizarre pace that varies between turbo drive and some slow moments chosen seemingly at random. The plot is also a victim of the film’s chaotic construction, losing direction and forcing its subplots in as if it were some sort of three hour epic with a lot of ground to cover. The supposed primary plot of the kids getting to know their dad is also hastily pushed to the side to make room for the many comedic appearances and sketches. The storyline is then literally wrung out of Travolta’s mouth as business meeting icebreakers throughout various points in the film. Indeed, the suffocating sequences of supposed humor are dutifully executed, leaving the narrative to be haphazardly relayed by Travolta.
-----Despite its many flaws, the end product remains a seldom boring, occasionally humorous outing due to the amount of jokes being forced out. But at a one-chuckle to twenty-joke ratio, ‘Old Dogs’ doesn’t even prove to be the enjoyable, if unoriginal, comedy that ‘Wild Hogs’ was. Rarely is there a funnier cast united for fewer laughs, not to mention an overused plot submissively relayed. In fact, ‘Old Dogs’ largely resembles another meager 2009 movie ‘Imagine That,’ with both containing similarly derivative stories. William’s relationship with the kids’ mom is also ridiculous, in that we’re supposed to see an attempt at love between the two, who in reality hardly know each other. It’s this tired plot that seals ‘Old Dogs’ place in the mediocre-to-weak category for attempts at onscreen humor. It’s hardly a painful experience, and one that gets the occasional laugh, but it’s certainly not worth a viewing either, even for those diehard fans of the comedians onscreen desperately vying for laughs.
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